As an exercise, make a list of exactly what you did today (pure action, no thought or motivation). Include everything you said and the tone with which you said it, every dollar you spent, and every way you in which you interacted or acted upon reality. If you can, do this for 3 or 7 days.
For myself:
- woke up with an alarm at 8am, scrolled on my phone until 8:27am.
- Got up, talked on Zoom for 3 hours.
- Lounged on a couch watching a show with a friend. Exhibited dramatic emotions elicited by the show, made jokes and laughed with friend. Tone was playful, but tired.
- Talked on Zoom for 3 hours.
- Went on walk with friend. Tone was quiet, asked questions.
- Talked to friend and 2 housemates.
- Drove in car to restaurant.
- Talked over dinner with friend.
My list isn’t doing this exercise justice, but I think you start to see the point I’m making. When most people give an account of their day, they are attributing meaning to each part, and drawing from that meaning their identity.
Your life will end up being the sum of everything you did throughout. They say that how you live your day is how you live your life. While this is less true for young people (since there is lots of “potential life” that is untapped, such as new types of relationships or interactions previously closed off), it is still a good forward-looking indicator. Old people don’t focus on the meaning, they focus on the things they did or didn’t.